It took me a long time to love myself and even longer to accept that it's 100% okay to love myself. Loving yourself does not make you arrogant or stuck up but instead means accepting yourself for who you are, and being totally okay with that. And once you reach that point, something very special happens... you're able to thrive.
I found self-acceptance once I was able to hold myself accountable for the areas in my life in which I felt unfulfilled. Taking responsibility is not an easy step but it was this moment in which I noticed a turning point in my life. Now I won't lie and say that life is a breeze, as I still have 'off days'. There's still the odd morning when I don't want to get out of bed, or where I don't like what I see in the mirror, or where I find myself having to do something I might not necessarily want to do. But the difference now is that I also know how to deal with these unpredictable feelings and moments.
Personal development is something which I value immensely and I cannot recommend it enough. It has helped me to overcome my own personal barriers which were preventing me from being able to do things that I really wanted to do. I want to share with you, 4 key things which I have embraced and learnt through personal development, in the hopes that it may encourage others to try and become the best version of themselves too...
1. Life begins at the edges of your comfort zones. In order to get something you've never had, you'll have to do something you've never done, and that is scary. Of course it's scary. The fear of failure and rejection is ultimately what holds people back from fulfilling their dreams. Whether it be feeling daunted about revising for an exam, scared to go to the gym, public speaking or speaking your mind, we all have something that we're afraid of being rejected from. Yet, the moment you disassociate yourself from the outcome, suddenly you become invincible. No matter what you do, there will be people who talk and there is always likely to be someone who's trying to bring you down. Don't be bitter and don't let the negativity get under your skin. In 100 years time everyone alive on this planet now is likely to be gone, which is a scary reality. So live for the moment and do things that bring you true happiness, regardless of whether or not it's received with universal positivity.
2. There's is always room to grow. In the interest of growing, you must first be completely honest with yourself. Maybe you've recently been through a trauma, a loss of a loved one, a divorce, a fall out, a redundancy or even battling a mental illness. There will be a point in all our lives where we need time to grieve, and to allow the hurt in. Because the sooner we can face those pains, the sooner we can grow stronger. How long are you going to relive in that moment of hurt? Pain exists, but suffering is a choice and you don't have to be a victim of suffering. As Long as you keep living in that moment in which the pain exists, you will drag out that inner suffering and you won't be able to truly embrace the next chapter of your life. So take the time to let the real emotion in, feel the emotions in every sense, and then breathe. Breathe, and take the next step of your life, not forgetting the pain but choosing to grow stronger because of it.
3. Your vibe attracts your tribe, so be the energy that you wish to attract (that's why we say positive vibes only). When I began personal development, I found it uncomfortable and slightly nerve racking, because it was making me confront my fears and my own personal negative attributes. Having a positive outlook on situations is something that'd I'd consistently struggled with. In my mind, I would be telling myself 'be positive', 'this is okay', but in my heart I couldn't physically bring myself to emote and portray what my head wanted, which I was able trace back to a lack of self worth. It may sound silly to some, but I don't doubt for a moment that others may relate. Have you ever felt like something is too good for you, like you don't deserve something because you're not worthy? I know I have. Instead we should start asking this: 'why should I not be worthy of something great?'. If something you value to be extraordinary in your life is taking place, don't question your own self worth but instead embrace that opportunity with open arms and make it work for you. Keep an open mind always and you'll increasingly learn to feel value from the extraordinary instead of trying to undermine your own value to justify it.
4. You are the most important project that you'll ever work on! Ultimately you need to ask yourself this: are you where you want to be in life? If your answer is 'no' then you can't quit. Don't quit until the job is done. It's okay to fall flat on your face, it's okay to fail! Every single failure is one step closer to success. Little fact but J.K Rowling's Harry Potter was rejected by 12 publications before being picked up by Bloomsbury and has gone on to sell over 450 millions copies worldwide. Just imagine if J.K Rowling had quit at the first hurdle of rejections, or the second or even the 12th. So the lesson here is don't give up, because the next time you try could be the break through you were waiting for!
So there you have it, 4 of the most important things that I have learned to embrace through personal development. What you do with this information now is entirely up to you, but please know that you are worthy of achieving your goals. Don't let anything or anyone hold you back and alway strive to be the best version of you.
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